Well hello there!

I figured it would be safe to update this journal briefly. (As safe as it ever is to post things on the internet, haha.)

I've been trying to keep up with comments lately, and noticed that there are a -lot- of truly amazing artists here on dA.

Some of my favourites are:



... and the list goes on and on. These are just the few that instantly came to mind, and it isn't out of favouritism despite being friends with some of them. No particular order either... maybe I will just continuously update this list as I have time.

I'm going to school right now, and not doing much else. To all you talented people: Keep up the amazing work. *_* <3

--Edit- 04/17/09 12:40 A.M.--

About half a month ago, my grandfather on my father's side passed away. (To me, he was my only grandfather. I never knew my mother's father, who died when she was barely a teenager.) I was never particularly close to him, or to that side of the family... but it still hit me. I drove up to the hospital right after school. Dad had called me and told me he had less than a week to live. So I went, and I saw him... all they could do was ease his passing. I remembered him as always being feisty and crochety, but still a good man. Yet there he was, so vulnerable and nothing but a shadow of his former self. He couldn't talk, barely was awake at all. He recognized voices, and had a different reaction for each one when he was awake. When my dad and uncles began to sing (they're a very musical family) he even waggled his eyebrows. ... we all went home around 10 P.M. I think. The next day in the afternoon, my dad called while he was working at a home & garden show to tell me he was gone.

I went with my father, one of my aunt's, and one of my cousins to cremate him. We were the only ones there. ... I'm worried about my father. He and I are very similar, we both internalize rather than be a burden on others. He puts on a smile for everyone...

The actual funeral is tomorrow. I'm going to pick up my dad and step-mom from the airport around noon, we won't actually make it to the funeral. But still... I look at my life now and know it is not where I want to be. It's on the way to where I want to be, but it's not there yet.

And really, no matter how much you think you may hate someone in your family... or maybe you feel like a stranger to them... cherish the time you have together. It won't last forever, and there are some regrets you can't change. I felt like a stranger to them, and I avoided going up to parties whenever possible. Because of that, I missed a lot of time with my grandfather and nothing I do now will change that.